MY LIFE IS SO HARRRRD

Dudes, something terrible is happening to me. I'm just being shit on from every possible angle lately and I can't figure out why, like is this karmic retribution for something that I did? Probably. Anyways, I ordered a pita from Pita Pit because I haven't had it in forever and jesus, doesn't that sound good, and I realized how hungry I was and that I've got to wait 30 minutes for the delivery dude to bring it to me because I'm a lazy bitch, so I reach into my drawer for these Saltines that I stole from Spoons (stealing condiments/sugar packets/crackers is the way I'm coping with the recession), open the package, and stop.

In the plastic wrapper is one cracker. One fucking cracker! What the hell kind of a jerk at the cracker factory decided to ruin my day like this?! There should have been two! Two crackers!

God you guys. My life is so hard.