Stop!

Before I go off on my little Aspen adventure, here's a picture that made me laugh. It's like, the nerdiest, most Whitney-relevant thing I have seen on the web all day.

Have a good weekend, kiddies!

We're Both Kinda Cute For Two Ugly People

I really don't have much to write about today, I just feel slightly obligated to post something. Also, my boss is MIA, so I've got all the time in the world, baby.

So it looks like John Mayer has retired from blogging. Good thing, too, because he was making me look bad. That guy had the most insanely intelligent writing style. It was so witty and well-spoken, and it only served to make me feel bad about the way I write. Good Riddance, John Mayer's Blog. ...I'll miss you...

Oh, of course, the big news item this week, (that actually eclipsed the "Britney's A Crazy Bitch" normalcy) was Heath Ledger's death. I was pretty saddened by it -- I was always a fan, and I think I still have a "10 Things I Hate About You" poster on my wall at my dad's house (don't judge. My room there hasn't changed since like, 1999). Anyways, I guess the official autopsy won't be back until Monday, and until then, feel free to speculate about what happened to him, because you won't find it here. There have been so many other good posts on his work, and his life, and I really don't feel like I would do him any justice. So if you're looking for some intense pontification, I'm sorry to say, but you just won't find it here today.
Here's a really good post that's a little out of the norm -- from someone who actually met him:
http://chelseatalkssmack.blogspot.com/2008/01/rest-in-peace-heath.html

Alright, that was depressing, so take a look at this:




I've been toying with the idea of moving my blog to an official website -- however, yesterday, Comcast shut off my fucking service before the end of the month, so I am without internet and cable. It. Is. Shitty. Seriously. You don't realize how much time you spend dicking around on the internet until you don't have it anymore. I had this big plan of building my site with Dreamweaver and launching it, but I guess that's going to have to wait a few weeks, until I can get my computer installed at (shudder) one of my parents' house. Guh.

Apparently everyone in the world knew about this song, "Heartbeats", but I just learned of it. It's by The Knife, out of Sweden. It's old, but it's a fantastic song.




A few weeks ago, I was watching Bloc Party's set at Austin City Limits from last year, and the next band that played was Ghostland Observatory. They are freaking awesome. It's just two guys out of Austin that play electronic music. Take a listen.

I spend a lot of time on Flickr, going through photos and finding new backrounds for my phone (bee boop boop, that one's for you Kraxburgular), but this set is really, really cool. It's people posing with album covers. Blogger's picture uploader isn't working right now (ah, memories from the past), so here's the link. Check it out.

http://www.flickr.com/groups/sleeveface/pool/

Alright, my computer is blowing up and I can't hear people coming down the hall, so I'd better stop where I am. Oh! I forgot! I'm going up to Aspen this weekend for the X Games. I'll report back, I promise.

Society, It Was Nice Knowing You

God damnit. I'm going to sound older than my twenty-two years here, but I seriously don't understand kids these days. Like, text-speak? What the fuck is that? Use some vowels! Jesus!

Like I mentioned before, "Crank Dat" jumped the shark the moment I walked through Zydecos and there were more white kids than black kids doing the dance to it. Actually, the moment a rap song hits the Fort, it's probably so out of date that when the DJ bought the album, they had to blow the dust off of it just to make it play. So what do you do if you're a one-hit-wonder like Soulja Boy? Easy! Just make another infectiously stupid song. And the hook on this one? "Blahrgightyhgighbyaaaah!" Seriously.



What the fuck is going on in this video? I seriously cannot wrap my mind around it. Tiny claymation gangster? Dog the Bounty Hunter lookalike? They couldn't even get the real thing?!

I'm sure, though, that I will have the song stuck in my head for the next 3 days, and will most likely be yelling, "YAHH TRICK YAHHHH!" at my friends. Damnit!

Showtunes?

I don't think people take enough videos on their cameras -- I mean sure, I like me a picture or two (or 1300, according to my Facebook page...sheesh), but videos really capture the essence of how drunk you or your friends really are. With this, I present to you: my friends Dan and Will, singing showtunes. So. Freaking. Awesome.

Honest to Blog?

Well friends, I know. Let me have it, I'm just as ashamed of myself as you are. I figured that because I am working full time, which means at least 8 hours of work a day, I should get a longer lunch. And since I usually work right through lunch, I figured it would be a perfect time to blog. Go me.

I suppose I should start this post off with a video from CollegeHumor -- some guy gets drunk, and amazingly recounts the entire Hamilton/Burr duel. What I haven't mentioned yet is that it has Michael Cera as Hamilton. Shitchyeah.



I’ve been a fan of Lupe Fiasco for quite some time now, and honestly, find me someone that doesn’t like Kanye West or Pharrell, and I’ll show you a liar. I’m fairly surprised that there hasn’t been more buzz surrounding this news item – the three of them have formed a “supergroup” (I use the term lightly because, well, it’s stupid).

"Chicago Runs Shit" is not just an opinion anymore. Kanye West, Lupe Fiasco and Pharrell have joined up to form a new super-group named exactly that. Lupe and Kanye both call Chicago home while Pharrell is a Virginia Beach native himself. A more fitting group of Chicago artists might have been Common, Lupe and Kanye. Regardless, the group (which isn't about fashion) is quite possibly the top secret project Lupe Fiasco referred to in an interview with Billboard magazine earlier this month. In that interview, Lupe was said to be working on a "top
secret project" with "another superstar rapper and someone who is a rapper/producer." It was not revealed whether or not this would be for an entire album or just a few songs. The 'CRS' group was revealed over the weekend when details surrounding the "Can't Tell Me Nothing" mixtape were released. The first song the group released is the track "Us Placers" which uses a sample off of Thom Yorke's (of the group Radiohead) "The Erasers."

The single, "Us Placers", is really smooth, and the video has much less hype than you would think – Lupe, Kanye, and Pharrell mini-doppelgangers rapping the song, along with a mini (and slightly out of place-looking) Thom Yorke.



And here’s a really cool Lupe video a fan made – try not to watch the whole thing.



I’m always trying to incorporate new phrases into my speech, because saying the same shit over and over again gets boring. Anyways, I’ve been trying to incorporate “Do me a solid” and “I’m salty” for “Do me a favor” and “I’m pissed”, respectively. I know how ridiculous that sounds, but I just wanted to give everyone fair warning. Hah.

And because this wouldn’t be my blog without it, here’s a video of a cat getting into a fishbowl. Cats! They’re so curious!



Am I the only one who is really, really excited for LOST to come back? I know that there are only six episodes (someone, just pay the fucking WGA already), which in Lost-time means like, one real episode because that show is such a mind-fuck anyways, but I’m still stoked. The marketing that ABC has been doing has been so viral that anyone who doesn’t watch the show wouldn’t get it. I suppose that’s good, because if I were an ABC exec, I wouldn’t want to do a big push to draw people in when the show you’re advertising is already incredibly cryptic and confusing in the first place. Anyways, there was a site: http://www.flyoceanicair.com , that announced the fact that Oceanic had “stopped its search for flight 815”. A little while after the site was launched, someone “hacked” into it, leaving a video message. Anyways, there’s a phone number for booking, and being the good little Lostie I am, I called it, but was just directed to the same voicemail box over and over again. If they’re going to make you do so much work, why not reward you for it?! Anyways, check it out for yourself, and let me know if you have more luck than I did in digging up more clues as to the next few episodes.

Like I said earlier, I got Netflix a few months ago. It’s pretty awesome. My favorite thing in the world is to sit on my ass and do nothing, so it really works well with that. The best part is that I can (blah blah blah, I’m so indie) find all of the movies on Netflix that I can’t get here in the Blockbuster store. I had been waiting for Half Nelson to come out for EVER – I seriously wrote about this movie in September of 2006. It finally came to my house, and lemme say one thing: don’t do crack. Seriously. The movie is about a middle school teacher who does a lot of blow, and drinks a lot of alcohol, all while trying to teach his students new ideas about history. There’s one girl in particular that takes an interest in Ryan Gosling’s character after finding him smoking crack in the girls locker room. They form a bond, made stronger by his increasing solitude and the fact that he is unable to share his secret life with anyone else, and her desperate need for a father figure. I swear to god I would watch Ryan Gosling talk to a cardboard box for two hours… that man is an incredible actor, and not to mention very easy on the eyes. That’s why I’m super stoked about the fact that Lars and the Real Girl is getting a wider release – I saw the trailer for it last weekend, despite the fact that it’s been released (but not widely) since October.

Even though the Rhapsody commercial kind of ruined their outright street cred, Cool Kids are awesome. They’re from Chicago, and have a really stripped down, late 80’s sound about them. This is my favorite track of theirs, “’88”:



Another song that I cannot stop playing is Adele’s “Chasing Pavements”. This girl has the most powerful voice – plus the song is really soulful.



This is a song that I put on Mark’s original CD before I accidentally erased it. I’ll throw it up here because I’m still recreating it, and Mark is stupid anyways. ;)
It’s by Mobius Band out of NYC. So good.



Alright, I guess I’ve written enough to keep everyone sated. Oh! I forgot! In my accidental hiatus, Good Bloggie hit 4,000 views!!! WOOOO!!!!! Thanks, anonymous blog readers! You give me such a heart on!

Ermmmm....

Hi. It's, uh. It's been a while! How have you been? Good? Good. Me? Oh, I haven't really been doing anything, just working. No, no, I don't have a real job. So... yeah! It's so great to see you! We'll have to catch up sometime! Heh.

I'm not sure if you remember me writing about a movie called Be Kind, Rewind a few months ago, but it's coming out next month. If you don't remember the plot, it was about a guy (Jack Black) who's brain erases the entire video library at a rental store. The store's most loyal customer is an elderly woman, who inspires Black and Mister Mos Def himself to recreate movies that she wants to watch. Basically, it's an excuse for the two of them to remake ridiculous movies like Robocop and The Lion King. Should be awesome.

I know that I'm kind of on my own in movie-fanatic world, and that most of you probably don't have Netflix or Blockbuster Online, but I always find it interesting the movies that people put into their queue. Right now, I've got Half Nelson and Kinky Boots coming in the mail, followed by Hard Candy, The Lookout, Lost In Translation (haven't seen it in a while), The Simpsons Movie, La Vie en Rose, This is England, and a few other random ones that haven't been released (Rocket Science, eeeee!). Matt recommended Once to me, I just apparently have forgotten to add it until now.

Have you ever read the "Best of" section of Craigslist? People nominate the especially ridiculous posts they come across, and then Craigslist compiles them all into one place. They're hilarious to go through, like this one, from Denver:

Free BLOW!!
Here's the thing, I'm trying to clean up my life, but I've got to get rid of all the drugs from my past. So last night, as I was trying to empty all my stuff into the garbage, my wife came out and started trying to rip it out of my hands. Needless to say, and argument ensued, and soon the neighbors were in on it too. We all stood there, arguing over what to do with the dope I wanted to throw out, when suddenly, my neighbor tried to rip in out of my hands. Now, I've got a serious problem. The bag ripped and the white powder went EVERYWHERE. I mean, it's all over the lawn, the driveway, up and down the street. There's just a bunch of dope out there lying on the street. I'm terrified that the cops will come at any minute. I mean, this stuff is thick, we're talking several inches just covering everything on the whole street.

Matt actually sent me a post from Denver once that was about someone giving away an entire bag of discarded Hammer pants. Oh, how much more amazing my life would be. Oh, and one post on "Best of" was addressed to "Cockless Fuckmuppet". Bahahah.

I came across a blog today that was entitled "My Blog is Poop". There's something so awesome in being entertained by stuff like that. Speaking of being ridculously immature (and trying not to be a bigot, I swear), I will never, ever be able to keep a straight face when I see this word:


Heh.

This video is cool -- the flight of a paper airplane from a building in New York City.



I don't think I actually posted on the whole In Rainbows Radiohead release, just because there was such a fucking hooplah about it that I didn't want to make myself sick talking about it. If you don't know what I'm talking about, Radiohead decided that its fans could pay whatever amount they wanted to get their new album, In Rainbows -- one cent, $200.00, whatever. It caused a flurry of talk about the "future of record sales", but I know for damn sure that Radiohead is probably one of the only bands that can pull that kind of thing off. I don't see anyone paying $200.00 for a Daughtry album. Then again, who knows. Those American Idol fans are like a pack of wolves. Anyways, I wanted an excuse to post this video of Thom Yorke (the man with entirely too many letters in his name), because the dude is crazy. Crazy genius, maybe, but a wonky-eyed one at that.


"That's betta than havin' two legs!"

I've been playing the shit out of the Cool Kids -- a couple of rappers out of Chicago that are making a moderate buzz right now. They've got a really stripped down 80's style, reminiscent of Run DMC. Check out this song, it is tiiiiight.




I could write something about the Iowa caucus, but I just don't have it in me. Instead, I'll just point out that "caucus" sounds dirty and then copy/paste something from an article.

Predictions, however, are difficult. The polls are all over the place. Among Democrats, a Des Moines Register poll showed Illinois Sen. Barack Obama leading New York Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton 32% to 25%, but a CNN poll found Clinton leading Obama 33% to 31%.Among Republicans, former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney was leading former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee in the CNN poll, 31% to 28%, but the Register poll showed Huckabee leading Romney 32% to 26%.

If you haven't, at my insistence, started watching episodes of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia", then you eff off. You eff off right now. It is so, so, so hilarious -- if number 1a. in my book is "Arrested Development", then "Sunny" would definitely be 1b. It's that good. Just watch this scene. Maybe my Facebook status will make more sense.

Alright, I can tell my computer is about to crash, so I'll leave it at that. Until next time!